Wednesday, 14 March 2018

A Good Kind of Fear - A Dose of Encouragement

I have never forgotten that day.

The day when I asked the question and my mother didn't really know how to answer me.

Have you ever been afraid?

I was lying in bed supposed to be going to sleep, younger than 9 years old (but not sure how much younger), when I decided to call her.

In my memory it was not dark in the bedroom because she didn't need to put the light on when she opened the door, so it must have been springtime or summertime when it stays lighter later in the evenings in Northern Ireland even up until 11pm.

So darkness had nothing to do with my fear.

It was a simple question I wanted to ask her but she did not find the answer so simple.

I was the youngest in the family, although in saying that there were only the two siblings, my sister and I, and she was 10 years older than me so I was always referred to as the wee one and often (I felt) not taken too seriously by my parents, sister and grandmother who lived with us.

You see that evening as I lay there I was afraid, there was something I just did not want to happen, something I could not imagine happening but I needed to know more about it.

I was thinking about death,

but it was not "death" that scared me.  

Possibly I wasn't really old enough to consider how people died and that there may be tragic events or illnesses to lead up to their deaths because none of that was on my mind.

The fear I had was not about my body but about that part of me, that part inside, the part I could not imagine ever not being in existence.  You know the part of me that was actually doing this thinking. The part that could experience this fear.  The part that could understand some things but not all things.

When I asked her what would happen to that part of me when I would die she was quiet with no immediate reply. Then she told me not to worry about anything to do with death because I was "too young" to be thinking about it.

Now I don't remember all the details or how much time elapsed from then until the time when I knew I wanted/needed to get saved but I do know that my sister always got bible notes to read each day and she decided to get a children's version so that she could read the bible passage to me and then the notes.  To make sure that I was paying attention she would then ask me questions about the passage.  However even though she was taking care of a need I had to know about Jesus and read God's Word she also declared I was "too young" when I told her I wanted to get saved.

Thankfully I was not overcome by this fear of what would happen to what I felt was the "real me" after death, however it was always there drawing me in to ponder over it.

We need to be thankful for the fear that leads us in the right direction

I may not even have known to pray about this but God knew the "real me" and He was in control and not too long after this He led me to the night when I was not told I was "too young" but instead I was encouraged to pray asking forgiveness and accepting that Jesus had died in my place so that I could live.

Yes me the "real me" could live forever.

I was afraid when I was young, but I didn't remain afraid, God has taken that fear away.

I still do not understand everything about what it will be like after death but I have no need to fear because I know for a certainty that the "real me" will remain and be transformed in the presence of Jesus.  Because I have come to realise that not all fear is bad.

I came to realise that not all fear is bad

We need to be thankful for the fear that leads us in the right direction because it's a good kind of fear.


  1. Oh how wonderful that God led you to someone who would finally not tell you that you were too young to think about such things! How precious is the heart of child. Jesus meets each one of us in that childlike heart also, where our true soul can meet with the true soul of our Savior. Thank you so much for sharing this precious story at Easter time!

  2. "We need to be thankful for the fear that leads us in the right direction because it's a good kind of fear." Amen, Sandra! You can see that God was already at work in your life even as a young child. Thanks for sharing this part of your story. Blessings to you! I'm your neighbor at #TeaAndWord.

  3. I agree that God uses our fears to draw us to Him and I love the way you shared how that happened in your life.

  4. A great perspective! To realize that fear can point us to the ONE who takes away all our need to fear. Christ. Happy Easter Sandra!

  5. Sandra, this is ever so true. We think of having fear as a negative UNTIL it drives us to The Way, The Truth, and The Life. Great post. Thanks for linking up.

  6. Great post, thank you for sharing such an intimate detail of your life!

  7. Thanks be to God that no one is ever too young for salvation. And that you persevered!
    How amazing that God uses our fears as a means to draw us to Himself.

  8. This is lovely! As a children's pastor, I never think it's too young to be thinking about God and a personal relationship with Jesus.

  9. I grew up hearing about an age of accountability, I was eleven, but i know people saved at 5 and 7, I would have been earlier, if you are thinking about being saved, you're probably ready at any age.

  10. This is a wonderful post... I'm sure your mom and sister were meaning well. They probably had known people that were 'saved' when they were young, but found out it wasn't sincere when they hit there teens... or something like that. I love the Spurgeon teaches about early childhood salvation, and shows us in the Scripture that it is real. "Suffer not the children to come to me". When my children were young, we went to a church that believed a child could not be baptized or take communion until they were 16, because the elders wanted to make sure they were truly saved (like 16 was a magical age!). We did not stay at that church for long. :-) Thanks for sharing this... it spurred on lots of thoughts for me! ;-)

  11. Thank you for sharing this! It's a great reminder for me as a mom that conversations stick with our children. Only God knows the heart and the timing of a person's true conversion, so we really shouldn't tell someone they're too young to get saved. I know we just want it to be authentic, but can inadvertently hinder them from getting saved.

  12. Wow. What a nice perspective. I never thought about fear in that way. I’m so glad that God lead you to write about this. Thank you!

  13. You were a deep thinker even at a young age. That's fantastic. Thanks for sharing your story and your wisdom about fear. I'll soon publish a memoir that includes my battle to overcome fear. In it I write that fear is not always a foe--sometimes fear can be a friend. Sometimes it's not easy to discern between the two, though.

  14. It really just takes a change in perspective!

  15. I think that's interesting that you can remember that moment with your mother, and even though she didn't know what to say to you look what it inspired you to question and think about!

  16. Thank you for sharing this perspective! Never thought about it too much!

  17. I'm glad you were able to find peace and that your fear didn't paralyze you from living life.

  18. so great that God tenderizes even the youngest of hearts!

  19. Thank you for sharing this, Sandra! It really is important to realize that no one is too young to get saved. Thank you for linking up over at GraceFull Tuesday!

  20. I remember having that moment as a child too x Thanks for linking to #coolmumclub