Showing posts with label husband. Show all posts
Showing posts with label husband. Show all posts


I Love my Husband - A Dose of Encouragement

and indeed I do love my husband

and I could list a whole string of reasons why I love him

but that's not what I'm going to do today.

I have seen lots of books and blog posts written about how to have a better relationship with your husband  and how to love him and there is a wealth of information out there for people who need to see ideas as to how to get back that love they feel has dimmed but I'm not thinking in that way today.

I'm just thinking of how I am so thankful to God that I still love Fred and he still loves me no matter what or who may have tried to make a difference in that situation throughout our many many many years of marriage and the 4 years of boyfriend/girlfriend.

I'm thinking about the times when I look at him leading worship in church and just think "I love that man", or the times I see him helping someone with something and I think "I love that man" or when he is smiling in a conversation with a friend, or lying sleeping, or sitting reading, or playing the guitar (with his guitar stare) or when he has on that comical smile as he teases me, or when he walks into the house from a work trip abroad or when he wears a suit. 

Yes you were probably sitting there following those times I was talking about and sort of understanding but when I got to that last one you probably went  


Well I have always loved to see Fred in a suit and I still get a special happy loving feeling when I see him in a suit.  I have also had many opportunities to feel like that because Fred mostly wears a suit to church and often has to wear one for work.

So hasn't God been good to me giving Fred a love for church and a specific job that means I get to see him in a suit lots of times?

I could go back to my list but I don't need to, I think you probably know that I simply mean that there is just that contented happy knowledge that we love each other.

So what do I do when I feel like that?

When he arrives home from a work trip I can hug and kiss him and talk about his trip and everything that has been going on at home and just spend a lot of time with him.

Similarly when he has that comical smile on his face.

When he's reading I can sit down beside him and tell him I love him.

When he's sleeping I can also tell him but he doesn't hear because I'll whisper and not wake him.

When he's helping someone or talking to someone else I'll just catch his eye and smile at him.

When he's leading worship I thank God for him - well it's not really appropriate to run up and give him a hug or a kiss is it?

Today I'm simply writing about that love we have which gives us the security in our relationship together.

The love that hasn't dimmed but it could dim if we let it.

That love which sometimes can be thrown out the window when there is a disagreement - but it shouldn't.

That love which sometimes can be forgotten about when we have to be apart often - but it mustn't.

That love which sometimes people just look on as a kind of contentment but instead it is the deep love which is cultivated by always remembering to share those feelings no matter how insignificant they may seem because they are not insignificant - Love is never insignificant.

Next time you feel "I love that man"  make sure you tell him at the FIRST suitable opportunity. 

Even if it is only in a whisper.

I am Petite! Who Cares? - A Dose of Encouragement

Yes. I am Petite!

That does not mean I take size 10 (UK) or below and it maddens me when people use petite in this way.

I am petite because I am smaller than 5' 3".

In fact I am not quite 5' 1"

I do need clothes that are the right length and in the right proportion but it can be very hard to find these even in the small sizes but much harder in sizes over 12. Then we also have to put up with a more old-fashioned look for the petites in those sizes.

When we lived in America I found a lovely shop called "Petite Sophisticate" and I just adored the clothes from there. But there was another problem and that is: Why should we have to pay more money for items that actually have less material in them than "normal" items?

My husband is almost 6' tall so there is a bit of a difference between the two of us. Even so when we had our first son I prayed that he would not be short like me but taller like his dad. 2 years later we had another son and I prayed that he would be tall as well. 3 years after that we had our daughter and I prayed that she would not take after me.

God answered my prayers and our oldest boy is almost as tall as his dad, the second boy is taller than his dad at around 6' 3" (sometimes we joke that I prayed too hard for him) and our daughter is about 5 inches taller than me. My sister used to joke that I needed a stepladder to kiss Fred (my husband) but that's not really a joke when it comes to Daniel (son no.2) and he normally ends up with a kiss on the neck instead of on the cheek.

So I was back to the petite clothing problem when my son Daniel was getting married and I needed an outfit.

I really needed a petite outfit.

Another thing that often goes hand in hand with someone being petite is the attitude of others towards them.

We get lots of remarks about our height.

"Gosh you are small!"

I know I am, do they think they are the first to have noticed?

"You'd better stand in front for the photo or you won't be seen."

I know I have to stand in front, do they think this has never happened to me before?

I normally look at my husband Fred in one of these "height challenged" moments and he smiles just the right way to show he has noticed and he knows how I feel. If he's near enough there will be the squeeze of my hand or a wee stroke on my neck.
Fred can do something just between us that makes me feel cared for in situations where others don't take time to think how I might feel.

Often people don't stop to think how we feel.

So looking for a special outfit is not an excitement for me but can be a dread because of the lack of choice and the way I may be treated.

I know I can't dwell on the fact that others aren't thoughtful or considerate all the time and I know that there are probably times when I don't stop and think to be as considerate as I possibly can.

There is only one person who cares about us all enough to know how we feel and what we need and that is the God.

When I see my husband being so thoughtful and understanding of what hurts me then I see something of the example of Christ and this is the way it is in a marriage. The husband is to love his wife just as Christ loves the church and this means being protected, provided for and cared for giving us security in our relationship.

So obviously when we see a good example of this in a marriage it helps us to remember the security we have in Christ even when we tend to temporarily forget His promises.

Of course this is another good reason to read some of the Word of God each day to be constantly reminded of how much Christ cares for us, enough to die in our place when we did not deserve His love.

Doesn't that make us feel cared for, loved and protected?

Doesn't that make us want to be part of His family?

Doesn't that lift us when others put us down?

Doesn't that bring us joy?

People don't stop to think how we feel. Who Cares?

Saw this riddle for the word PETITE
and I just wish it were true 

but it makes me smile anyway.

Well what about that outfit I had to get for Daniel's Wedding?

You can read all about that at What Will I Wear?


Here are some other  Doses of Encouragement

Which Point of View? - A Dose of Encouragement

One night in Kettles hotel near Dublin, breakfast, free wifi.  

Get to the room and tv is not easy to work, wardrobe hanging space is only high enough to hang trousers so nowhere to even hang a coat.

One of the bedside lights missing has obviously been broken off the wall.

Wifi very poor, keeps losing connection, and basically not even strong enough to show emails with pictures and takes ages to download emails on my ipad plus most apps keep saying there is no network connection.

We had got a Groupon deal so not our first choice but it had sounded better or at least read better than it was.

My husband trying to work (when he should be relaxing but as usual something had cropped up) & calls are ok but some stuff cannot be done as he can't get things downloaded.

What's the solution?

Go home the next day early and forget about actually going into Dublin City.


 Is this the best solution?    Yes

He needs to access the data and it can't be done tonight here so he needs to go home to a good (better connection) to do so.

We can come see round Dublin another time because we are not so far away from it and anyway after over 20 years since last being there another few weeks or months won't matter.

I don't need to get too annoyed because it will only affect me and him and that's not fair on him when he has work deadlines and stress enough from that.

I also don't need to make him stay and go around the city for hours when he will still have his mind on work so it will not be so pleasurable for either of us and will actually only be more stressful for him with a deadline approaching.

How do I spend my evening while he is struggling with the laptop?

Well it is the evening when Sandy (not named after me) is about to hit the East coast of America so I'm watching all the news on CNN (one of the few channels available in the room).  We lived in the state of Delaware for 3 years quite some time ago but because of that I know places that are being mentioned, I have been to some of the places where the reporters are actually standing & later tonight Delaware is going to be hit by the effects of this storm.

It all boils down to how we allow ourselves to view things.

So when I consider how many people are already without electricity because of Sandy and how many are going to be left homeless; I can put my couple of days into perspective and not allow myself to get distraught over our situation and certainly not put more pressure on a good, loving, hardworking husband with whom I have spent 35 years of married life and intend to share many more.

God has given us instructions which are always for our benefit and one of them is about loving others.

It all boils down to how we allow ourselves to view things.

If it is only from our point of view and not taking others into consideration then we are on the wrong track as we will never be happy and others will know how much we don't care about them.

Here are some other  Doses of Encouragement